Breakin' my Rule

I have a quirk when it comes to the year-end holidays. Perhaps I'm getting crusty and irritable in my old age, but I think a little Thanksgiving is just what the doctor ordered for many of us.  Thanksgiving has quickly disappeared in the mad consumer-driven rush to sell, I mean celebrate, Christmas.  My preschooler keeps asking me if it's Christmas yet when we enter a store filled with decorations and  music.  Not a turkey, pilgrim, or cornucopia in sight!  I'm fairly stubborn, so my family knows that the Christmas season starts AFTER Thanksgiving in our house.  We are going to wait and embrace the spirit of Thanksgiving first.

Well...sigh.  We've talked about taking Ian here

to see this

Photo from Up Chicago.com

and this

Photo from The Cardinal

and this.

Photo from Lifeway.net

So I'm breaking my own rule.  We will still be striving to instill thoughts of gratitude at this time of year.  But tomorrow we'll be joining the throngs of other parents lining Michigan Avenue to see the parade and light the tree, just a little early this year.  NO TREES in the house until next Thursday! 

Have a great weekend.

Time for Play

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

No play?  No time?  One of the most frequent topics I hear discussed among women, whether it's while grabbing a snippet of conversation in between playground equipment or sipping coffee at Starbucks, is finding balance in life. What do we allow into our days?  What do we edit out?  24/7 is hardly enough.

Sorry to disappoint you, but this is not a post about how to navigate the jungle of playdates, sports, music, school, family time, church, work pursuits, and other activities that seek to devour precious time. Except, perhaps, practicing the word "NO."  Consistently.  Brutally.  Even against the cultural tide of busyness that threatens to sweep the years away before we know what has happened, and we find ourselves looking back on a landscape littered with piles of activities and lists that no longer seem important.

What I know to be true about my own life is that I am MORE than dull when I don't make time for my own unique version of play.  The proverb might be rewritten like this, "All work and no play makes Kristen impatient, tired, discouraged, dull, less creative and less grateful." Gotta play.

Before there is a cacophony of voices demanding how play is supposed to happen, I want to acknowledge that there are different phases of life.  There are seasons when creating time for play is less complicated, when time and freedom are more abundant. There are also seasons when time is scarce, a precious commodity in our personal economy.  We wonder whether play can really be part of the picture. Adding in play takes committed intention. 

Please don't give up, even when it takes more intention.  The intentionality required will force you to sharpen your vision, to narrow your focus and spotlight the priorities that are most cherished in your life. You might find that you can be ruthless when cutting the extraneous junk out of your life.  It might require you to, say, keep the TV off at the end of a day instead of collapsing on the couch.  Maybe it means trading childcare to find a couple of hours here and there. Guilt-free.  Not easy.  I know, I know.

One of the ways I play is to get outdoors and run.  Up early before my husband leaves for work, I roll out of bed and lace up my shoes in the dark. Many Saturday mornings I step carefully and creak down our old home's hallway and close the door behind me, leaving my two favorite guys sound asleep in their warm beds while I head out into the crisp air.

Sometimes the start is groggy and sluggish--have to admit it--but on the return I'm energized and thankful.  I feel the strength God has given me surging through my arms and legs, grateful for my lungs breathing deeply.  My heart rate quickens and my body does the amazing work of supporting the increased exertion I'm asking of it.  I find my spirits lifting as my feet pound the ground and the miles tick by.  I always notice the trees.  They change season by season, mirroring the continuing changes in my life as time marches on.  When running with a friend, I find encouragement in hearing her life journey and embrace the connection in conversation, sore muscles, and laughter.  By myself, I crank up the playlist on my iPod and JUST GO.

What do you do to play?  Have you made any time for it lately?

Out of the Comfort Zone

I spent the teen years of junior high and high school working hard to fit in, perform well in sports, snag decent grades, and curl my feathered hair into Heather Locklear waves (Hello 80's).  Friends ruled ALL for me.  Teachers, parents, and coaches were in the mix somewhere, but heaven forbid if I didn't have a posse.  I needed girlfriends for sauntering around the hallways during lunch, entering the basketball game to find a bleacher seat, circling the mall looking for cute guys and hoping we were cute too, and taking multiple trips to the bathroom. I'm fortunate, I guess.  I actually can say that I look back at those years and have a surprisingly large number of good memories despite the snake pit of hormonal teenagers corralled together in what we like to call high school.

But underneath that, sometimes I cringe when I remember the people I ignored in my quest to be with those in my "target" comfort zone.  I have one clear memory of feeling elation at being invited to sit with a large table of girls who--at least in my estimation--were "it" girls.  The tables scattered around our cafeteria were filled with laughing, teasing teens.  Then I turned slightly to see three girls who were not considered "it" girls, sitting at a nearly-empty, silent table.  Their eyes were down, faces sober.  My gaze lingered for a moment, and I can still remember the question popping into my head, "What would happen if I walked over there and joined their table?"  I quickly pushed this thought aside and turned away from them, uncomfortable observing their isolation and yet unwilling to jeopardize my status.  Though I was not always this blatant, I continued looking for people in my comfort zone throughout college and even into my 20's, though I would have liked to think myself more evolved.  I might have reached out externally to people--yes.  But often there was an internal judgment occurring, of which I am not proud.

Then a curve ball came my way.  I got married around 30--a pretty typical age for Chicago singles who enjoy their freedom, higher education, and careers.  And then...I couldn't get pregnant.  Slowly, everyone around me had one, then two.  Still no baby.  People became awkward and changed the topic of mothering when I came around.  There's much more to that story, but the point here is this--many women in my target comfort zone became uncomfortable with ME.  Oh.  Huh.  Ouch.

Curve ball again.  Years later, I somehow managed to become pregnant with my first child.  Fantastic!  We were and continue to be thrilled with our little guy.  And just as those I had known who had been having children for the last several years were returning to work and starting the soccer/baseball/music lessons/dance recital marathon of parenting school-age children, I decided to resign and stay home full-time. 

Just for a little more challenge, my husband and I decided to pile on the additional layer of practically-annual moves from one community to another.  We were gypsies without a place to call our own--in our late thirties when everyone else was being responsible and paying mortgages like proper adults should be--and we were living like recent college graduates.

Every time these life shifts happened on a different time table than everyone else, I was presented with a choice...be isolated or get out of my comfort zone.  This was not easy for me, at all.  Just saying.  I can't tell you how many moms groups, church nights, community playgroups, and general local gatherings I entered into with butterflies in my stomach while I scanned the room for a place to connect.  I have now lost track of how many times I have initiated, "Do you want to get together?"  I made new friends and expanded my comfort zone.  Good stuff.  I also found out what it was like when people were not interested in taking "new friend" applications, or at least not mine.  Life had set me into a different place.  I felt (and sometimes still do) like the three quiet girls back in that old cafeteria, looking and hoping for a place to belong.  I've also learned the power of initiating, taking awkward first steps, and inviting others into your home and life.  Also good stuff, although not quite as fun as those who immediately want to enjoy life with you and share a good laugh while doing so.

I can say that over the years this was just one of the lessons God taught me through fertility issues about how to reach out to anyone, everyone, in all walks of life.  About how to "cross the room" and engage people from different cultures and different lifestyles.  I'm proud to say I count my good friends as being many years younger and many years older.  We live in tiny apartments, huge houses, and those homes all sizes in-between.  I have friends who cannot stand exercise and crafting, although I love both. I enjoy friends who share my faith and those who do not. We focus on the things we love and respect the differences between us.  I am keenly aware of how much I learn from these relationships, even the ones that aren't always easy.  So thankful to get out of the comfort zone and trek into the unknown.

Linking this story here.

Pinterest, can't get enough of you baby!

For many years, I was an email-only chick, through and through.  I hesitate to even say when I FINALLY started texting, but I can assure you that it was long after the rest of the world.  After I tentatively started texting, my next move on the social media front was to sign up for Facebook.  I was pregnant and fighting morning sickness 24/7, so it gave me a somewhat entertaining option that could meet the requirements of staying horizontal on the couch while keeping my mind distracted from the ever-present nausea.  Catching up on the latest adorable pictures of the kids, the recent vacation, the family visit, crazy wedding receptions, the incredible night out with friends.  Does anyone besides me ever feel like I'm comparing the most boring parts of my life with the most exciting parts of everyone else's life on Facebook?  For a few reasons, I decided to take a step back for a while and then re-enter Facebook World more cautiously, including a tighter circle of people and limiting my use so that I still emerge from the office "cave" to interact with the rest of life.

Then, along came an invitation to Pinterest.  A relative who knew of my constant craving for crafting (nice alliteration, thank you)  mentioned that I might want to investigate.  Still being wary of Facebook re-entry, I opted for a Twitter account to access Pinterest.  I will be honest and admit that I'm not exactly swept away in the Twitter craze at the moment.  I'm not married to a Blackberry (I don't even own one!), and I don't feel overly compelled to know every move that is made by people I follow.  I'm a lazy Twitter user, the one who gets annoying messages like "We've missed you on Twitter!" cluttering my inbox.    Nonetheless, it seemed like less work than Facebook so I signed up and connected to Pinterest.

Sigh.  Ahhhh.  Oh, Pinterest, I am drawn to you the way I'm drawn to great design blogs.  I can go on and on.  I confess that there have been a couple of afternoon nap times that were spent getting completely lost in my vision boards or simply surfing the scenery. Tasks that were meant to be accomplished during nap...oops.  Later. 

I am continually boggled by how much creativity is out there!  Amazing.  I'll never be able to actually finish all the ideas I see displayed, but it's fun to dream about some and try a few.

I'm here at Pinterest.

Start Where You Are

I have heard this statement multiple times, most recently on one of my regular reads, here.  It bears repeating, however, and it has encouraged me to do just that...get my rump in gear and start right from here.

I was just rereading my blog...June 2011 since my last post.  A busy year, mostly devoted to my son and working on some things in our own lives.  But I've got the itch to blog again, start checking in here and there and writing about life.

So here we go...

Tweaking the Apartment

I'll always be trying something new!

I love blues and greens.  No matter what I do in my homes, I'll always incorporate different shades of those two basic colors in at least some of the rooms.  I typically lean towards lighter, softer shades of blue.  However, recently I have been interested in bringing some stronger color touches into the room.

Before, our large sofa area looked like this.

I still like this a lot, but since the spring I've wanted to bring in more blues with the summer season.  There are a couple of different pillows in the room--I love the stronger blue lines around the border.  It's a little more geometric in design than I typically use.

I changed out the large black Ikea frame from a vintage bird poster to these Natural History vintage shell printouts (Graphics Fairy blog).  I painted some cardboard roughly for an edge and used Mod Podge to adhere four printouts to the center of the cardboard.  I love the colors and the way it turned out overall.

Our TV stand used to look like this.

You can't tell from the above photo, but there is an open back under the top surface which allows a few cords to be visible.  This always drove me nuts!  So I did a new version, shown below.

The back is now finished with a cardboard shape I cut out to fit the space and covered with sale fabric. No more cords, and I like the beach vintage vibe of the fabric!  You can also see that I tried to create a grouping of pictures.  I've always loved that look but have never really done a random group of frames and photos.  Some of the frames display printouts are from the Graphics Fairy blog.  GREAT resource!

The bottom piece is a ceiling medallion from Home Depot.  I made a background with a botanical print from Graphics Fairy and put a picture of my dad and my son in the middle.  I am going to experiment more with different ways to use the ceiling medallions in the future, next time using paint to accentuate the designs around the border.

Our living and dining rooms are connected by a wide doorway with a nice flow.  I don't like too many things out in both rooms, it makes me feel overwhelmed.  It takes away from the beauty of a few items when there are so many to look at all at once.  So I removed some items from the dining room to keep it simple.

In the photo below, I covered a piece of cardboard with a burlap remnant I found and used upholstery tacks I had left over from another project to update our dining room photo board.  I used a couple of black and white photos my son and I took recently for Father's Day.  I slipped it inside a garage sale frame that I got for about 50 cents and had already painted earlier. The burlap coordinates with the khaki sofa fabric from the living room.

 

A few tweaks and a few dollars and we're soaking in the beach vintage vibe I enjoy so much.   My taste is still evolving and I can't change everything at once, but it's a lot of fun to experiment!  Now...the craft projects and tweaking MUST be done as we have guests coming this weekend to stay for a week.  The fun part of preparations is done and the grunt work begins...CLEANING.  I have a wonderful friend who is going to take my son for a day while I do my best to get our apartment ready for nine people to live together.  Whew.

Cruisin' thru June

Summertime...and the livin' is easy.
Fish are jumpin'
and the cotton is high.

George Gershwin's tune was one of my favorite songs in college when I was working with a voice teacher.  The melody perfectly complements the lyrics, in my opinion.  It feels a little lazy, a little slow, and invites you to let out a long exhale, lean back in your chaise lounge, and sip cool lemonade.

June has started off with some changes, a trip to TN, a new class, and some new summer goals for me.  This past week we went to Tennessee to visit family and attend a wedding of friends.  The wedding--although brutally hot--was a beautiful traditional Tennessee affair.  The wedding was outdoors by a wonderfully aged barn.  The women had gorgeous dresses paired with flip-flops!   We strolled across the lawn to the tent with ice-cold drinks and a BBQ feast. As the evening wore on, the patio turned into a dance floor, the strung lights swaying back and forth with the hum of celebration.  My son had a fantastic time visiting family.  He had the absolute luxury of running outside to a huge lawn every morning, (swim trunks on right away), and played in the wading pool every possible minute.  He loved it!

We've got some personal changes as a family to address.  As I learn to adjust to the challenges, I'm looking for ways to maintain peace in my heart and patience with the situation.  I created a sanctuary spot for myself, where I keep important tasks at my fingertips, quotes and encouraging scripture or passages, journals, and a few items that help me take a deep breath when I'm feeling frustrated.  The peonies from the farmer's market are wonderful!

I'm reading The Happiness Project.  It's an interesting approach to creating a more peaceful, positive attitude in your life.  While I know my true source of joy is from Christ, I must admit I do think the same way as the author, Gretchen Rubin.  I'm inspired to try making some more intentional choices about my attitude and how I spend my time.

Many months ago, back when winter was still blowing with its full force in January, I started an online class called Soul Restoration through Brave Girls Club.  I'm beginning the second class in the series and it will be fun to see what great projects and instruction we get this time around!

This week I'm heading to the local running store to pick up my Mother's Day gift...new running shoes!  Running is so peaceful for me.  It's particularly beneficial to de-stress when facing some of the personal changes in our family I mentioned above.  I put these on...

 

grab this...

 

and head out here...

for a refreshing, invigorating boost.  Trekkin' on and lovin' it.