Lessons from the Wemmicks

If you haven't read the book You are Special by Max Lucado, I highly recommend you read it when you have the opportunity.  Although it is a children's book, there are truths for children and adults alike.  I have the tendency to put myself down and place my own value in the hands of others instead of standing secure in what I know to be true about myself.  While I read it to my son, I hope and pray that he will learn to live in the knowledge of his worth.  At the same time, I absorb a little encouragement for me too!

In this story, Punchinello is the main character who lives with other Wemmicks, wooden people all made by Eli the Carpenter.  Each day, the Wemmicks hand out stickers to each other.  Gold stars, not surprisingly, are for those who are attractive, talented, and intelligent.  Grey dots are given to those who are falling apart and make mistakes.  Punchinello struggles because he is often the recipient of the dreaded grey dots and the more he tries for gold stars, the more discouraged he becomes and the more mistakes he makes.

 Finally he meets Lucia, a Wemmick with no stars or dots.  He learns her secret is to visit Eli the Carpenter and spend time with him. She knows her true identity is not in what the other Wemmicks think but in the fact that she is loved by her Maker.

 Punchinello loves the idea of living free of the marks given by other people and as a result visits Eli and begins to understand that he is loved beyond what he could have imagined.  His healing begins.

What a great story.  It is so easy to become more focused on pleasing or impressing other people and as a result get completely distracted from spending time with God, our Creator.  How often do we allow ourselves to be defined or judged by others instead of resting securely in what we know to be true?  Do we find too much value in receiving admiration of others?

Away with the stars!  Away with the dots!   Lucia had the right idea, living free of the marks place by others and fully enjoying her true value.

Sorry?

Whew...it's been a while.  A few nasty colds and out-of-town guests later (the colds were nasty--not the guests!), we are settling back into a normal routine.  It feels good to fall back into some familiar rhythms and be able to enjoy getting out of the house.  As much as I am a winter chick, I join the hordes of  Midwesterners wishing fervently for spring to make its welcome appearance.  I can just envision the first tiny green buds popping out on the branches outside our windows.  A couple of days ago I was delighted to see the tulips pushing up and reaching into the fresh air.  Beyond that, I am already anticipating loading my son up with our beach gear in a wagon and walking across the street to soak in the waves and the sand on the shores of Lake Michigan.  Ahhh.  Can't wait.

But today, although it's warmer than many winter days, we are still not quite ready for the spring and summer activities coming soon.  So my son and I were out playing with other moms and kids in an indoor area.  My son, as toddlers are prone to do, was becoming too rough in his play with another child.  As I observed what was happening, I scooted over to intervene.  After talking with him, I directed him to apologize to the other child.  He was not in favor of this idea and made it known!  Fast forward.  As I finished interacting with him, I overheard another individual commenting that she hated it when her parents made her apologize when she wasn't truly sorry.  The overall gist of her opinion was that we're just teaching kids to lie when we tell them to apologize if they really don't feel sorry.

Now I must confess that my insecure side immediately flared up and I felt hurt and defensive that (in my opinion) my parenting was being criticized.  However, trying to get past that muck, I did reflect on the other parent's comments.  After thinking about how I handled the situation, I concluded that I wouldn't change my desire to have my son apologize.  Am I teaching him to lie and be angry with me for expecting him to say or do something that he doesn't feel in that moment?

I fully anticipate that he will be unhappy with some of my expectations, especially in the heat of the moment.  That's just going to be reality for many years to come.  But teaching him to lie? The incident made me recall a discussion I had recently, in which someone pointed out that emotion often follows theology, and emotion will catch up later.  Maybe in a moment when we are struggling with negative emotions, we won't feel like apologizing when we've wronged or in some way offended others.  The theology I believe shapes my actions (I try, anyway!) and I recognize that in order to make a conciliatory gesture to "right my wrong," I need to say those words...even when I don't feel very sorry.  Besides, learning to say "I'm sorry" can be incredibly powerful in relationships.  I'm sorry can melt icy silences.  I'm sorry can open the doors to conversation when anger blocks the lines of communication.  I'm sorry demonstrates an attitude of grace, forgiveness, and humility as Christ modeled for us.  I'm not suggesting this be done in a doormat mindset that leaves no room for healthy boundaries.  However, there are many times when we've done something intentionally or inadvertently to offend, and the apology extended can be instrumental in repairing either a small crack or large fissure in a broken relational bridge.  Furthermore, the more we practice our theology, the more our emotions will run parallel to the theology we're living out.  As behavioral patterns form and our minds are transformed (Romans 12:2), we will have more discernment to recognize what is true and right, act on it, and our feelings may gradually be more in tune.  Of course there will always be times that we don't feel like making the right choice, but when we do it anyway we increase in this little bit of growth I like to call building character.

My son is not old enough to have this discussion, so for now he will be expected to apologize when he hurts others.  Hopefully as the years pass we can talk more about why we apologize so he can at least have an early understanding that we apologize not in a deceitful attempt to patch things up but to genuinely demonstrate love, kindness, and a little healthy humility. 

Now after all of those thoughts...do you think I can remember this during the next disagreement my husband and I have with each other?

Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.  Romans 14:19

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’^{[a] 31} The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’^[b] There is no commandment greater than these.”  Mark 12:30-31

A Friday Aftenoon

It looks like spring today and it feels more like spring today.  We're even going to Spring Forward this weekend.  These brought some of the spring mood inside...

 

I decided for certain on Ash Wednesday what I wanted to focus on for the next 40 days.  While some of those thoughts are personal, I will share that I want to work on being fully present in each moment.  I desire to discipline my mind not to run unleashed through all of my concerns, to do lists, and ideas so much that I forget to engage in the beauty of each small moment.  I am so much more grateful and content when I live this way.

I was reminded of this as I took my camera and began snapping some photos today.  Plants and flowers always encourage me to be present in the moment, because I stop, crouch, lean forward, and focus carefully so as not to miss out on the artistry of each small detail masterfully designed by our Heavenly Father.  What would it be like if I engaged in this manner more often?  Would I notice more people in need?  Would I catch a smile more often from my family?  Would I spend more time in awe at the work of God's hands?  How many times have I missed something precious?

I hope that I will discover more about living into each moment so I don't lose out!  It's a challenge to change old habits and start new ones.  But I love it when something fresh and new is blooming.

Gifts from the Weekend

I returned yesterday from a refreshing weekend in Oak Brook.  I had my friendship tank filled to the brim with great conversations.  Some were funny, some were serious, some were revealing, and some were instructive.  I even got a good makeup tip (Bare Minerals, anyone?).   Both Saturday and Sunday mornings allowed for a walk on the area paths with a friend.  Yup, we bundled up and braced ourselves against the wind while we chatted non-stop about life (thanks to my sweet roommates for putting up with my early rising!).  That's what I love about spending time with women, especially my sisters in Christ this weekend.  It is so incredibly good in our current culture to see and actively experience TRUE beauty, which I observed in a community of women seeking and worshiping God with all of their hearts.

My life's journey over the last ten months has been pointing my heart and mind to the state of my soul.  God has used multiple tools to lead me to new places of healing and learning.  I have been striving daily (often minute-to-minute!) to train my thought patterns not to drown in the lethal cocktail of anxiety and insecurity, and to lean into scripture like never before for the only effective antidote.  This weekend was a resounding affirmation to these past months and my current efforts to live out the truths I am learning in fresh ways. 

One of the workshops I attended, taught by Susan Shadid, was called Liturgy Matters.  Not growing up in a liturgical setting and having little exposure to many of those traditions and their related history, I found it intriguing.  I am fascinated by the idea of following a rhythm of time that draws my mind to Christ throughout the year.  As a result, I have decided that for the first time I will participate in the Lenten season this year.  I will be attending an Ash Wednesday service this week and am now reflecting on how I personally will use these 40 days to contemplate Christ's sacrifice and what this means in my life (there is a helpful overview here).  I am eager to experience this Lenten season and wonder how it may impact Easter weekend, which often goes by with a nod and a prayer...topped with a loaded Easter buffet that leaves me stuffed and more interested in seeking a nap than in celebrating Christ's miraculous resurrection.

I am so grateful today for the gifts from this weekend.

           Blessings to you today as you trek through life.  May your soul know true beauty.

Soul Matters

The soul matters.  In a big way.

The last week we've had a lot going on at home.  In addition to busy schedules and long, unfinished task lists, my son was ill.  Several days were spent inside our little warm cocoon at home and we were both itching to get out.  As soon as we walked through the door and hit the sidewalk, he opened up his little arms wide to the world as if to say, "I'm back and I'm lovin' it!"  I know how he felt.  We even got to make a stop at his favorite park down the block to take a quick trip down the slide.

 This upcoming weekend is a women's retreat through our church called Soul Matters.  I'm staying with friends in a nice hotel and enjoying good teaching and personal time.  I'm leaving Friday and returning Sunday at lunch so I'll get a wonderful opportunity to enjoy some connecting with God, others, and myself.  I'm definitely bringing my running shoes along and hoping I can find a pretty trail in the area where the hotel is located.

When the soul gets a little weary from the daily trek of life, it's good to make sure that time with God is a priority.  Even if it can't be in the form of a weekend retreat, I find that quiet time to journal, read, and pray sharpens my vision and fills my tank for the next task at hand.  It's helpful for me to be in touch with those habits and activities that replenish my soul. First and foremost, I need...
Time with God.  This is all I need, I could stop the list here!  

There are other soul "thirst quenchers" that I can think of too.  This is not an exhaustive list, but a start:

• Walking outdoors (surprise!)
• Time having fun with family
• Journaling
• Crafting
• Reading
• An evening out with friends
• A new decor or cooking magazine
• Trips to the flea market
• Going to the library
• Trying a great new restaurant
• Putting my feet up with a glass of wine and watching a good movie with my awesome husband

Make time for the things that speak to your soul, your soul matters!

DIY Sunburst Mirror

There are certain design elements that I am drawn to every time I see them.  I love mirrors!  Not necessarily looking IN them, mind you, but I like the way they embellish a room.  In a couple of weeks I'm going to be doing another mirror project...well, I'm getting ahead of myself.  Most of the sunburst mirrors I have seen are quite pricey, so I decided to try one of my own.  I saw a few ideas out there which were great, like this...

Photo by Isabella & Max Rooms

and this...

Photo by Nesting Place

and this too.

Photo by Under the Table and Dreaming

I decided to head out to  Home Depot and use a little of the above inspiration and little of my own.  I like my version too!

Supplies

• Plumbing equipment from Home Depot (I'm sorry, I cannot tell you what they are, exactly.  I found them in the plumbing section with bins of similar equipment.  See pictures below.)
• Round wooden clock base from Michaels
• Craft mirror
• Hot glue gun & glue sticks
• Spray paint
• Hardware to hang pictures
• Craft paper (optional)
• Mod Podge (optional)
• Beads (optional)
• Sandpaper

Directions
1.  Collect supplies.  Peel tags from plumbing pieces.

2.  Lay out the desired spacing around wooden circle.  For those who are more patient than I am, you may want to draw lines on the back of the wood circle to be exact!  I just "eyeballed" it.

3. Start gluing the copper plumbing pieces around the wood circle.  I started by placing two pieces across from each other.  Imagine a line going from 9 to 3 on an analog clock, and then two more pieces placed at 12 and 6.  These are your base pieces.  It is easier to fill in from these starting points.

Note:  Since the copper parts have a curve to them, it was necessary to elevate them on a pile of books while gluing.  I started with a stool but the books worked more effectively.  I also found that the curved shape of the pieces made it necessary for me to hold them securely in place for about 15-20 seconds before I let go.

4.  Once the pieces are glued on, you may choose to cover up the holes in the copper pieces with beads or another embellishment.  This is optional--I just preferred to add another detail to my design.  Using the hot glue gun again, I circled around each hole with glue and then placed the bead over the top of each hole.

5.  Now that the gluing is finished, the pieces can be painted.  My pictures don't show this, but I used dark grey spray paint first and then white on top.  I knew I would use sandpaper to distress the mirror, and I wanted a uniform base color of dark grey to peek through the white when sanding.

 6.  After the paint has completely dried, it's time to begin distressing! Take the sandpaper and sand as much as desired on the wood.  A VERY light rubbing across the copper pieces which are your "rays" (as well as the beads) will also result in an aging effect.

7.  (Optional step)  I took a piece of craft paper, traced it to fit the circle and cut it out.  I spread mod podge on the back of the paper so it would adhere to the back of the mirror.  It's not perfectly flat, but it gives a more finished appearance.

8.  Get a hammer and attach the picture hanging hardware.

Here is the finished project in my living room!

  

I'm linking up to Transformation Thursday at Shabby Chic Cottage.and Frugal Friday at The Shabby Nest.

Apartment Decor Updates

Unfortunately I have a sick kiddo this week.  Most days we are on the go, out and about town, visiting friends and playing together.  Not feeling well, my little guy has been content to just hang out, which leaves mama with no opportunity to trek outside (more about outdoor trekkin' soon...the weather with a little one has meant I need to explore in other ways!).  So in the little windows of time when I'm not taking care of my guy, I've been working on a couple of tasks at home.  I have a craft project that will be posted about once I am all done, so I'm excited to get that finished!

I also updated my kitchen chalkboard...long overdue.  When we first moved into our apartment, I had a long space that needed "something."  I took an old mirror we had, painted the mirror with chalkboard paint, sanded the frame down to look more distressed and hung it up next to the cabinets.  It fit perfectly!  My next thought was that I would write the new menu for each week on it.  Yeah...right.  I haven't exactly kept up on that, and our friends probably think that we eat the same meals week after week. 

I decided to write something besides the menu and opted for some of my favorite herbs and flavors instead.

I also added a touch of Spring and Easter to my dining room.  When I was at Target recently, I found some blue and tan eggs with nests (vase filler) which I used around the room.  I'm loving birds as well...

  It's good to keep creative when I can't get outside as much--it keeps me in a good place and loving life!